The Soil of My Heart
“A farmer went out to sow his seed. As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path; it was trampled on, and the birds ate it up. Some fell on rocky ground, and when it came up, the plants withered because they had no moisture. Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up with it and choked the plants. Still other seed fell on good soil. It came up and yielded a crop, a hundred times more than was sown.” When he said this, he called out, “Whoever has ears to hear, let them hear.” (Luke 8:5-8)
When you purchase a package of seeds and open it, the contents inside don’t look like the photo on the label. Much like our outer selves can sometimes mask how we feel inside. The seeds need to be cared for, and so do we. Once the seeds are planted in the rich soil and fed with light and watered, they take root and flourish. We too need to be fed with the Word of God and washed over with Living water.
Prior to the birth of my son, Leo, the seed on my heart sat upon soil that was hardened and dry. God tried to take root, but thistles and thorns also grew and choked out precious space that blocked the ability for my faith to take hold. I believed in God, yet many of my actions didn’t align with trusting in His ways.
Fear was navigating my path and guiding my steps. Then Leo spoke three words that forever changed my life, “I see Jesus.” During this time of isolation, Leo cultivated my soil and allowed the seed that sat upon my hardened heart to take root in God’s love.
In our stillness I learned how to be like a tree, planted by the river of water, and meditated on the Word of God. It was Leo’s example that hydrated me and grew my thirst for the Lord. In our stillness, we were moved by God.
As I watched the calmness settle upon Leo’s mind despite the excruciating pain that he endured, I began to really see that we can rise above our circumstances and choose to be in the light of God’s love. Leo’s joy and belief were watered daily with the love of the Holy Spirit. His faith grew deeper and his roots spread. His love embedded into my heart, my family’s heart, and the heart of the community that surrounded us. Leo’s light burned bright which allowed those around him to also believe. His joy became their joy having them reflect on their own life and wanting more. In return they believed they could have more.
By feeding your mind with the truth of God’s Word our roots take hold and the enemy loses control over what holds us captive. As a result, we become free with belief. And with belief it is only natural that joy will become a part of our lives. We weren’t meant to be consumed with worry and carry burdens. We were meant to humble ourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt us in due time, casting all our cares upon Him, for He cares for us. (1Peter 5:6-7)
On this four year anniversary of Leo’s death, I will not let my heart be hardened, but rather sprout life into myself and others so that many will see the love of God shine through me.